It seems like now that I've miscarried all of these pregnant women are coming out of the wood work... the universe is taunting me, saying "look what they got and you didn't."
Im in a lame gloomy and pissy mood now. I'm not anxious so I can't take one of those pills, but I wish I had something to make me feel better. I want to cry, but it just wont come out. Today is one of those jealous "hater" days. My friend Tara was over today, I picked her up from the car rental place and she had her 6 month old son Gabriel with her. I held him and played with him but it was like being stabbed in the heart at the same time. But it's good for me.
I only have 2 months until we can start trying again. And in all honesty I am going to start trying and just let it happen. I dont want to take test after test and find out as early as I did this time. I would LOVE to already be 12-13 weeks when I find out like I did with Amara. Then the risk is gone, I'm already in my 2nd trimester and the pregnancy will be shorter. Hehe. Women are allowed to be selfish like that.
Well I'm glad I stopped by... again. I guess I feel a little better, I just wanted to vent for a minute.
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